The Personality Traits Men Find Irresistible In Women

The inner beauty men love in women’s personality; is the supreme realization of the innate idiosyncrasy of a living being. It is an act of high courage flung in the face of life, the absolute affirmation of all that constitutes the individual, the most successful adaptation to the universal condition of existence coupled with the greatest possible freedom for self-determination.

If you are obsessing about whether a man will fall in love with you because you do not look like a cover girl, forget it. You need more than just your outer beauty to get a man to fall in love with you. Sure your looks may initially catch a guy's eyes, but it will take more than your looks to keep him. So in this post I will share the five personality traits that men find irresistible.

Your looks cannot buy a man 's love. So forget trying to surgically alter your appearance in order to attract men. If you are thinking about going to a plastic surgeon to get an extreme body makeover, you may end up doing yourself more harm than good. What men find attractive in women goes way beyond what a woman looks like. 

If looks were the sole reason men fall in love with women, then why do some men still cheat on their beautiful girlfriends and wives. And if you look closely, the girls they have these affairs with are nothing to write home about. The reason? That is precisely why I have written this article.So without wasting any more time, here are the five personality traits that men find more attractive than beauty alone:

Pt#1. Sexiness

The sexier you are, the more attractive men will find you. So what is sexy? Being sexy does not apply to any one aspect of your being. Sexiness has something to do with how you dress, talk, carry yourself, and interact with men. If you have a good sense of style and you know how to wear clothes that complement your figure, then you have won a third of the battle of being sexy. And the way you carry yourself when you interact with men, makes up the other two-thirds.

Pt#2. High self-esteem

If you cannot walk into a room and feel confident that you have what it takes to attract the single men in that room, then your lack of confidence will ooze out from every pore of your body and paint a picture in the minds of the men who are looking at you. But if on the other hand you walk into a room looking self-assured, more men will find you attractive.

Pt#3. Pleasant personality

You can get more guys to chase you if you know how to smile and show your happy and friendly side. If you walk into a room looking like a guy just dumped you and you have that look that says, "I hate all men", then men will read your message loud and clear and stay away from you. 

Pt#4. Intelligence

You don't have to be a brain surgeon to get a date with the cutest guy at the party. All you have to do is speak intelligently about issues of the day and a lot of men will want to talk and get to know you better. 

Pt#5. Approachable

This personality trait ranks very high when it comes to the traits men find very attractive in women. If your friends find you easy going, then thank your goodness. You stand a much better chance of attracting more men. But if your friends think that you are very difficult and hard to get along or live with, then you can be sure that the men you meet will feel the same way.

Sadly, many women will go their entire lives without ever experiencing true love and connection with a man they care about. I don't want you to be one of them. This blog will show you exactly how to find the love you’ve been waiting your whole life to find and do it in a way that will make you feel good inside because you'll know that you're giving yourself and a man what you both Really want - an attractive, happy, and together woman. I personally guarantee it.

I will talk to you again soon.Keep on Dating There is someone out there for everyone.

Best of luck in life and love!

Thanks!

Why Men Hate to Commit to Women In A Relationships?

To begin with let me ask you this simple question;Why are you playing the hot and cold game with him? If your relationships with men seem to get harder over time, instead of closer, and even though you love each other, you find you start turning against one another instead of towards...Then you need to find out the truth about what will quickly stop this pattern of conflict and withdrawal and inspire your man to be a great partner to you again. So if your man is having a hard time committing to you, he may be doing so as a result of one of these reasons;

1. He is getting all the benefits of being in a romantic relationship without being engaged to you.
So if you are giving him all of you without him being fully committed to you for the long term, you present him with a situation where he sees no tangible reason to take that next step when he is getting all of you free of charge.

2. He is afraid that what happened to his parents might happen to him so he is being extra cautious. Some men want to be in romantic relationships, but when they remember what happened to their parents -- divorce -- they get cold feet.

3. They have not finished sowing their wild oats and committing to you one hundred percent will prevent them from getting their groove on.

4. You are not quite what they have in mind. They are comfortable hanging out with you, but they don't think you are exactly what they are looking for.
It does not mean that you are not good enough for them; it is just that you do not fit the type of woman they are looking for. For example -- some men want freaks in bed -- a woman with a high sex drive.
If you meet their expectations in all the other aspects of life and you just don't have the kind of sex drive they want their future wife to have, they may not want to commit themselves to a long term relationship with you.

5. You do not challenge them enough.
They see you as someone they can pretty much tell anything and get what they want. Men want women they have to work hard to keep.

6. You may have some issues with your weight that they may not be very comfortable with. Sure they seem to enjoy your company, but the weight issue may be keeping them from making you the woman of their dreams.
Most men are simply afraid of the fact that their woman may gain the kind of weight that will end up turning them off down the road.

7. If you have no drive or ambition, some men will not want to commit to you. If they sense that you are not the type that will contribute to the financial well-being of their home, they will not be very motivated to stay with you for the long term.

8. You have a tendency to want to control them. If a man feels that you are the type that will end up wanting to control their life that man will not want to be romantically involved with you for the long term.
He will end up keeping you long enough for him to find a woman that will let him be himself.

9. He may be in the middle of trying to move onto another relationship that he is working on. While he is trying to make sure that the other woman is the one he wants, he will keep you hanging -- he will not commit to you.

10. If a man sees that you are a big flirt, he will not commit to you.
Why? Well, no man wants to be in a relationship with a woman who cannot control their flirtatious ways with other men.

So you see, men have a ton of reasons why they may not want to commit to women.
So if you are not getting the kind of commitment you want from your man, then you need to either change certain things you are doing, or simply let him know what you want and if he does not act on it, then move on.

I will talk to you again soon.Keep on Dating There is someone out there for everyone.
Best of luck in life and love!

How Your Body Is Speaking Alot Than What You're Thinking?Body Language and Attraction !!!

1. Introduction – Where does this all start?

Body language is defined as nonverbal, and mostly unconscious, communication through use of gestures, postures, facial expressions, and alike. To the trained eye, it can reveal the thoughts of any and everyone, as well as their current emotional condition.

Various studies have indicated that communication made between people in face-to-face conversation, consists of a less than 35% verbal component, and an 85% non verbal component.

Examples of this can be seen in every day life; a woman who is conscious of having gained weight about her thighs will smooth her dress down, and a guy who is unhappy will sit down with his arms folded, legs crossed, and a slight frown on his face.

Studies also indicate that women are much more perceptive than men – Hate to break it to you guys, but most of you just aren’t wired that way.

The average woman has over 14 areas of her brain dedicated to communication, whereas the average man will only have between 4and 6. This doesn’t mean that guys have no hope of reading body language accurately; it just means that most men will have to
consciously try to read a person’s body language, whereas most women will automatically do it subconsciously.

This blogpost will help you explore and define the different actions, postures, and gestures of a person who likes you and is seeking your attention. It is important to understand that as well as being able to pinpoint whether a person is using gestures that indicate he or she likes you, it is just as important to be able to spot those gestures that indicate whether a person doesn’t like you – to help you gain a balanced view of their true feelings.

2. Ground Rules for Accurate Body Language Reading

One of the most common mistakes a rookie body language reader will make is to interpret individual gestures in isolation of other gestures.

For example, when someone rubs their left hand on their right arm it can indicate many things – negative feelings, sore arm, or maybe they are just cold – it all depends on the other gestures they are using at the time.

Another key factor is the circumstances under which certain gestures are made. A classic example of this is ‘the woman in the short skirt’,
who sits with her ankles crossed tightly in front of her. Ankle crossing is usually associated with negativity and defense, however a woman with a short skirt may cross her ankles for certain obvious, necessary reasons – i.e. she may not be being negative, she may just be trying to stop people seeing up her skirt.

Remember that practice makes perfect. Body language isn’t always easy to read because there is often so much going on at one time that it’s hard to keep track of it all. My suggestion is that you take 15 minutes each day and dedicate it to reading peoples’ body language .This way in time, reading body language will become second nature.

3. What Do The Eyes Tell Us?

Often described as the windows to the soul, the eyes can give us great insight into the true thoughts and feelings of a person in any situation.

Dilating Pupils

When someone is feeling positive, when they like the company they are keeping, and when they hear something that they agree with, their pupils will dilate. When someone is feeling negative, when they don’t like the company they are keeping, and when they hear something they disagree with, their pupils will contract.

Dilating and contracting pupils are known as ‘micro gestures’ – they cannot be consciously controlled and often go unnoticed by the untrained eye.

Although dilating pupils are often a signal that a person likes you, it is important to read this gesture in context. As we all know, changing light levels also affect how dilated or contracted our pupils become, low light will result in dilated pupils, and bright light will results in contracted pupils. Always look for this micro gesture and evaluate it against other gestures being used by the particular individual.

‘Looking Up’

Used particularly by women, this gesture involves lowering the head at the neck, and looking upwards at the other person. This gesture makes people appear more childlike, and evokes a parenting reaction in both men and women. If someone uses this gesture on you, it is likely that they’d like you to perceive them as ‘cute’ and vulnerable, i.e. in need of care.

Eye Contact

Making lots of eye contact is a way to show interest or respect. The more eye contact a person makes with you, the more that person likes you. Studies also show that even if you aren’t initiating the eye contact, the more you look into someone’s eyes, the more romantic and enjoyable they will find your company.

It is important to remember that making too much eye contact early on in a relationship can sometimes make people feel pressured and insecure. If you are trying to make a good impression on someone, build up a slight rapport first, and then gradually increase the amount of eye contact you give them.

4. The Smile

Smiles are often big indicators of whether or not someone likes you. The key thing most people (men in particular) don’t realize is that there are different types of smile, and that each type of smile can mean a completely different thing. Therefore when someone is smiling at you, it isn’t always a signal to make your move and go talk to them.
Many people use fake smiles to make them appear approachable and submissive. A fake smile can be spotted because it involves only the jaw muscles working, whereas a true smile involves both the jaw muscles and the muscles around the eyes.

A true smile will often produce ‘crow’s feet’ around a person’s eyes, and the person’s teeth are usually visible. A true smile is an indicator that a person likes you, however there are many types of smile that we see from day to day – not all of them mean positive things.

The Tight Lipped Smile

A tight lipped smile is spotted frequently in every day life. It is exactly what it says on the tin – the lips are stretched across the face forming a straight line, and the teeth are not visible. The tight lipped smile is often used by someone who is hiding something that they don’t want to share with you.

It is a favorite used by women who don’t want to show that they don’t like someone. Most men are completely oblivious to the true meaning of this smile.

Sideways Looking Up

This gesture consists of a tight lipped smile coupled with the ‘Looking Up’ gesture from the ‘Eyes’ section in this EBook. Contrary to the meaning of the solitary tight lipped smile, this gesture is used mainly by women to convey that they like someone. This smile invokes the parental, caring instincts in men, who see the smiler as playful, and juvenile.

5. What Hands Say About People

There are 2 basic rules you have to remember when looking at hand gestures: Open palms (when you can see the palms of someone’s hands) suggests openness, honesty, and a liking, whilst closed palms(when you can see the back of someone’s hands) suggests that they may be hiding something, are closed to your ideas, or are feeling like they are in authority.

Classic examples of this are seen in every day life. When people are apologizing, they may say something like “I’m sorry” coupled with presenting their two open palms. The open palmed gesture is like saying “I feel comfortable around you, I like you, I am being honest, and I have nothing to hide.” If you see someone making open palmed gestures at you, take this to heart and read their other gestures to confirm how they are feeling.

Closed palm gestures are used frequently too. For example when a child is lying or concealing something they will hide their hands behind their backs, and when someone doesn’t feel like talking they will put their hands in their pockets – symbolizing that they are ‘closed’ and don’t want to talk.

Again it is important to bear in mind that hands in pockets may also simply mean that the person is cold, or something else. Remember to read all gestures in groups and context.

6. Arm Signals

In body language, the arms are known as barriers that are put up to protect a person from harm. Arms gestures are typically used when a person is lacking in self confidence, feels threatened, or just doesn’t want to hear what you are currently saying.

Arm gestures aren’t a definitive “I don’t like you”, however they do indicate when a person is having negative feelings towards you.
When someone is using repetitive negative arm gestures, coupled with crossed legs or ankles, you’ll know its time to change the conversation.

Crossed Arms over Chest

Both arms are folded across the chest – this is a universal signal used everywhere. Its meaning is clear, “I don’t agree with what you are saying, I am uncertain, I don’t like this situation”.

Self Hug

The self hug is characterized by one arm at a person’s side, and the other arm clutching at their elbow. As children, our parents or carers hugged us when we were feeling sad, uncertain, or tense. The self hug is an attempt to recreate the feeling of security we got from those hugs. A person using this gesture is likely feeling insecure.

Elbow Touching

Everyone likes to be touched. Interestingly, studies shows that people who touch others elbow are more liked than those who do no touching. I say elbows in italics because it is just that, elbows only.

The reason elbow touching is acceptable is because it is far away from the intimate parts of the body; touch a stranger anywhere above or below the elbow and their reaction may be a little different.

It is a fact that girls do more touching than guys, but equally: if a girl or guy touches your elbow it is a sure fire sign that they like you, and that they want your attention.

7. Body Pointing

It is true that the body points to where the mind wants to go. The angles at which people stand when speaking to each other give us clues as to how they feel or where they want to go.

Open Positioning

Just like with palm gestures, when a person likes you or is interested in you, they will adopt an open body position. An open body position can be spotted by looking at the angle of their body relative to yours.
Typically in friendly encounters, the other person’s body will be pointing at an angle 45 degrees relative to yours – subsequently you’ll find that you’re body will be doing the same.

Closed Positioning

Closed positioning is used when two people want a bit of intimacy. Their body angle will change from the ‘friendly’ 45 degrees to 0 degrees, i.e. they will face each other. If someone uses closed positioning with you, it’s a signal that they like you a lot.

Try taking half a step forward, into their intimate zone – if they seem uncomfortable with this or they take a step back, don’t follow.

Leg and Foot Pointing

As stated in the blurb for this section, the body points to where the mind wants to go. Equally true is that a woman’s feet will point to the most ‘attractive’ guy in the room, and vice versa with guys on girls. This same principle applies to leg pointing. If you watch carefully, you’ll see that a guy’s knee will be pointed in the direction of the girl he finds most attractive.
We see these principles every day, for example when someone wants to leave a room, at the very least you’ll see that their feet point towards the exit.

8. General Flirting and Attraction Gestures

When in the company of the opposite sex, the body language of both genders will change dramatically. Men will stand a little taller, no slouching or slumping.

He will also stick his chest out and suck in his stomach – this makes him appear more dominant, and happens automatically around someone he likes or has taken a fancy to.

If a woman takes a liking to the described man, she will respond to his gestures by drawing attention to her breasts, tilting her head, touching her hair, and exposing her wrists –thus making her appear submissive.

There are of course, more deliberate flirting and attraction gestures, but these are gestures made consciously, whereas the ones described above are automatic, and made subconsciously.

9. Attraction Gestures Used by Men

Compared to women, men don’t have a large repertoire of attraction gestures. When a man likes a woman, he will use gestures that emphasize his masculinity.

The common gestures used by men are the expanding of the chest, straightening of the back and pulling the stomach in. He’ll also adjust his clothing or touch his hair.

Men typically use their thumbs to display dominance and masculinity; subsequently a man will tuck his thumbs into his belt, pointing them at his crotch to emphasize his manhood.

10. Attraction Gestures Used by Women

Fortunately for guys, women send out a whole plethora of signs and signals to let him know she’s interested in him. Unfortunately for women, many men are slow on the uptake, completely oblivious to the signs and signals she is sending out. What makes things worse is that women sometimes send out mixed signals, to manipulate men into showing how they feel about her – this often leaves men confused and subsequently, they won’t try to approach her.

When a woman looks around a room and sees a man she’s interested in, she’ll often send a gaze his way until she catches his eye. During this first look she typically holds his eye contact for 23 seconds, and then she looks away. Women may then perform other gestures to show interest in her chosen guy.

A woman will use something known as the ‘Hair Flick’ around a guy she fancies. This gesture involves flicking the hair over her shoulder or away from the face. Even women with short hair use this gesture.

Another gesture to watch out for is the ‘self touch’. When a woman slowly and sensually strokes her thigh or neck she implies that if the man plays his cards right, he may be able to touch her in these ways too.

The limp wrist is seen as a submission signal by many men, and as such is used by women everywhere to make a guy feel that he could dominate her. The limp wrist gesture is often used for maximum effect when fondling a cylindrical object.

A similar gesture to the limp wrist is also used by women to reel in a man. This gesture is known as the ‘exposed neck’, and is exactly as the name says – the woman will tilt her head to one shoulder, exposing her neck to the man. This gesture is seen by men as submissive in much the same way as the limp wrist.

11. Single?

When people see someone they like, sometimes the only thing holding them back from making an approach is the thought that maybe their crush isn’t single. Imagine this scenario:

An attractive girl sees a group of people standing across the room from her at a bar. She has her eye on one of the guys in the group, and uses the gazing technique to let him know she’s interested.

He’s a bit slow on the uptake or maybe just a little nervous, so she decides that maybe its time to go over there and give him an opportunity to talk to her. At the same time this occurs, she notices that her crush is standing next to another attractive girl, who seems to be part of the group.

This throws the question “Are these two together?” So should she stay where she is, or still go over to his area?

Personal Territory

It is a scientific fact that the closer two people are emotionally, the closer they will stand, sit, or lie next to each other. Imagine a bubble around each and every person. This bubble encompasses the person

and a small surrounding area. To that person, everything inside that bubble is ‘theirs’, and is known as their ‘Personal Space’. The size of this personal space varies a little from person to person but doesn’t differ to a great degree.

When two people are very close i.e. Lovers, Parents, Spouses, Close Friends, Children, they will stand for the majority within 1545 centimeters of each other. Only those who are emotionally close to us may enter this space and anyone else who enters may make the person feel intimidated and take a step back from the invader.

Touch and Personal Claim

People touch or lean against something that they feel is theirs. For example a person will sometimes lean on their walls at home, but wouldn’t dream of being invited into a stranger’s house then leaning on their walls. Lovers will hold hands, brush each other’s arms, or ‘tidy’ their partner up by brushing imaginary lint off their partner’s shoulder.

One of the most unmistakable signals made by women to show claim to a man is when she places her flat palm on his chest. Similarly a man will place his hand on his partner’s waist or back.

The key things to remember here is that we touch things that we feel are ours, and we do this in a variety of ways. Watch for the slightest touches, fingers, arms, or even feet.

12. Conclusion

Although body language is universal in its meanings, it really is very easy to get confused or mixed up when reading people’s body language. As mentioned at the beginning of this blogpost, practice makes perfect and the more you practice reading body language, the easier it will become. Always remember to read gestures in groups, and always remember to take into account the environment around the person you are reading.

Thanks for Reading
If you liked this post and found it informative, please let me know. By leaving your comment at the end of this post.


I will talk to you again soon. Keep on Dating There is someone out there for everyone.
Best of luck in life and love!

Thanks!

Build Emotional And Intellectual Attraction With Him

Dear Readers

Imagine attracting a man emotionally and intellectually in such a way that he absolutely can't resist wanting to be around you.

Not only that, but imagine all the obstacles and excuses falling away. No more "I'm too busy" or "I have to work through some issues." The only thing he'll know is his desire to be with you.

In this post I am going to reveal specific ways to subtly communicate to a man the things that will "trigger" that intense level of attraction inside him.

You can literally have a man who wasn't totally "feeling it" for you suddenly take notice and see and recognize the things inside you he simply didn't look for or see before.

Stick here now and turn up the dial on the level of attraction a man feels and experiences with you on both a Physical and Emotional level.

You'll be glad you did. I believe it could bring some amazing changes into your love life with a few small tips.

Now, ladies, let's get down to what's really going on in your heart when it comes to men and relationships.

Here's what I want to know first...Why is it so easy for other women to fall in love with a man, and for their relationships to effortlessly come together and grow...

While you keep attracting all the men out there who are "unavailable" or who seem great at first, but eventually get scared and just can't go "deeper" with you?

Is this "unavailable" thing really a problem so many men are carrying around that gets in the way of love?

Or...Could it also be that you play a part in finding men who are "unavailable"?

Or that you bring about that unavailable response inside a man, a response that even the most "evolved" men have lying dormant inside them?

I want to share with you what could be a new and enlightening perspective on all this..There's an important realization all smart and loving women come to at some point in their love lives.

It's a "light bulb" that suddenly just turns on... and when it does you instantly grow and see things with a new sense of clarity.

Unfortunately, most women only come to this important realization after they've been through the pain and frustration of doing everything they can think of to "revive" their relationship and failing.

I'll tell you what this realization is:It's that when you're with a man who is feeling or acting uncertain with you - even if you could give him an "ultimatum" that would move things ahead to the place in your relationship that you want -

You're in a very dangerous and "weak" position for your relationship. He's not really making that decision based on what he wants or feels.

It's a weak position because you really want and need a man who is truly committed to being with you on a physical, mental, emotional, and even spiritual level. Not coerced, not forced, not convinced. committed. Totally and with all his being.

Knowing this, let me ask you...Do men truly commit and choose to love and become loyal, caring, affectionate, etc. just because a woman asks them?

Or does a man need to have his own reasons for being and feeling this way? It's a very important question.

If you've had one or more relationships where you were ready for "more"... but the man you were with was seeming to drag his heels, or just not care about your relationship... and you tried to make it work but it only seemed to backfire – then this question could be one of the most important questions you ever ask yourself.

Seriously.So as a bit of homework, I want you to stop for a second and think about it...Do men truly commit and choose to love and become truly loyal, caring, and affectionate just because a woman asks it of them?

Or...Does a man need to have his own reasons for truly feeling and being this way with you, if it's going to last?

For a deep look inside how men really think about and approach a truly loving and committed relationship with a woman, and how to help a man recognize and do the things that will make your relationship last... you need to read this detailed letter I've posted online right away:

WHERE TO START IN LEARNING ABOUT WHAT MAKES HIM WANT TO COMMIT WITH YOU

Let me be unusually direct with you, for your own good: Have you finally figured out that if you don't know how to get a man to open up and talk and share his deeper thoughts and feelings with you... then it's going to be impossible to make your relationship work?

Lots of women think they get how this works because they talk a lot about what's on their mind.
For most women, this is common Communication Mistake #1 in their relationship:

Sharing your feelings first, and often, because you believe this will somehow get him to share his feelings in return.This is not a great way to get a man to "open up" to you and get in touch with his feelings. This is not his "emotional process."

Especially with a man you're in a relationship with who is already acting "withdrawn" and has shut off his feelings from you.

This kind of more is better approach about talking and sharing your feelings actually works against you more than it helps you with men who are acting uncertain and withdrawn.

Here's the deal:If you know anything about a man, then you should know that to get to know his feelings, then more talk about your feelings is not the answer. Which leads me to common Communication Mistake #2.

Out of all the things that can go wrong in a relationship, I've found one that causes women more pain, frustration, and leads to bad outcomes with the man in their life than anything else...

I've watched it happen over and over with all the women I know - my friends, my sister, co- workers. I also get tons of e-mails from women who read my blog who write to tell me this all- too-familiar story.It's the same issue that keeps popping up at the beginning of their romantic relationships -

EXPECTATIONS.

It's when a woman expects that the relationship will progress to something more committed, but ends up feeling disappointed when she finds out the man doesn't want the same thing.This problem usually plays itself out in one of two ways. I'm sure you'll identify with one (if not both) of these:

SCENARIO #1: You know exactly what you want out of the relationship, but rather than "rock the boat" by having a conversation in which you make your expectations clear, you decide to wait it out in hopes that the man will soon feel the same way and that everything will just "work itself out."

SCENARIO #2: You know exactly what you want out of the relationship but as soon as you get the sense that the guy doesn't share your desires or isn't "on the same page" emotionally, you subtly and unconsciously decide to pretend that you're cool with things just being casual, even though you know you need a lot more to be happy and content.

Predictably, when you find yourself in either of these two scenarios, it becomes a slippery slope toward ultimate relationship disaster.

Here's how this plays out:First- you start feeling unfulfilled, anxious or worried that you're not getting what you want and need from the relationship

Second- you don't know how to say what you're feeling and what you want in a mature, honest way, so you say nothing at all, or you drop "hints" that are misunderstood or ignored

Third- he doesn't change anything about the way he's treating you or the relationship, and you become frustrated or disappointed with because he doesn't really "get" what's missing and what you want from him.

Fourth- your frustration builds up even more and either brings you to an emotionally destructive confrontation with him that freaks him out (like an ultimatum)... or all the silent tension and negative feelings between you make him act distant, disconnected and maybe he even starts losing interest in you

Remember going down this road? Not fun, huh? So what's going on here? And what can you do about it?

Stick with me here, and I'll reveal some basic insights about how to get a man on the "same page" about where your relationship is headed without all the drama, tears and frustration.

"CENTER" YOURSELF FIRST... AND GET CLEAR ABOUT WHAT YOU WANT

What you need to do first, before you do anything else, is get clear about what you want and expect from your love life.You need to be honest with yourself first, before you can be honest with anyone else in your life.

Stop pretending you only want a "casual" fun fling when what you really want is to have a committed, serious relationship that's "going somewhere."

Here's the thing: Getting clear about what you want will help guide your mind in all kinds of positive directions to help you find and attract the right situations and people in your life.

But, unfortunately, being clear and honest is not that simple for most women when "the rubber meets the road" in dating and relationships.The reality is, knowing what they want and expect can turn into a source of extreme frustration and anxiety for a lot of women.

Why is that? I'll explain. Expectations can definitely set us off in good directions in our lives... But when we don't feel like we have the control over how to get those expectations met, the "wheels really start to come off the car", so to speak.

To get the inside scoop about how the commitment process works for a man, and how to transition from "casual" to deeply committed in an easy and effortless way, without the usual uncertainty and fear that comes up when you have "The Talk" ... I strongly suggest you check out my blog post.

Ok, so let's get back the concept of expectations and disappointment. A woman may "feel" like the man she's been dating is "The One" and she can see things getting much more committed and serious, but she also senses she doesn't have the right tools or skills to know how to communicate those desires to the man in a positive way.Simply put, the woman is afraid that approaching the guy with a heavy "talk" will either scare him away.

Or...She herself doesn't know what "taking it to the next level" really means to him, why he would want this, and how to go about talking about it in a way that builds trust and makes him want to open up and share.

So she avoids telling him what she's really thinking and feeling about their relationship.Instead, she starts to accept or downplay the little disappointments she feels.

Until one day she finally wakes up and realizes that she doesn't have the kind of relationship she thought she would have with this man, and she's just not happy with herself or the situation.

And sometimes this "awakening" doesn't even happen until after the man cheats or leaves.

Ouch. Hey, I get it. Men can act more than a little insensitive to all of this, and even act like total idiots when it comes to appreciating and respecting the great relationship you already have together.

But hang on for a sec.Let's just simplify things and boil it down to that one thing that is the cause of all the trouble and confusion:

FEAR.

The unfortunate truth is that some women don't want to dig deeper into what a man truly wants because of their own fears.They're afraid of finding out the truth about what a man truly feels about them, and their future together. And the most dreaded fear of all.

Rejection and Abandonment. These two things are so strong and powerful that something fascinating happens in the woman's mind when there's even a small potential for either of these.Their mind starts a cycle of self-deception. Here's how it works...

The fear of pain and loss often leads us to ignore our thoughts and intuition and replace our fearful thoughts with happier thoughts that make us feel comfortable.
It's the mind's "emotional defense mechanism." I know you felt this before.

How many times have you been unsure - deep down - about the man you are seeing, but instead of examining those doubts and finding a way for you to deal with your own feelings, you decided to actually build him up to your friends and family as being a wonderful catch because you didn't want to face some of the problems lurking deep in the back of your mind?

You thought that you'd help things out by telling yourself and having faith in what you wanted to be true.And sometimes, in the process of making up these "new truths" you even start to convince yourself that he's a better guy than he actually is?

Or maybe you've been in a situation where you've gotten no indication that the man you're seeing wants any kind of serious relationship, but you choose to believe that you're building a committed relationship as things slowly and naturally escalate.

Making those assumptions without the basis of direct communication can lead to big trouble down the road.Save yourself the wasted energy and the broken heart.

If you're looking to move past the fear and insecurity you feel but don't want to get in touch with or let anyone know about, then I'd like to help you get in touch and start the "healing" and growth process.

And I'd like to help you quickly get to that great place you know is inside you where love and amazing experiences and emotions simply flow in your life... and draw the right man and the right relationship to you all on their own.

Remember, a man can't read your mind, or know all that's in your heart.And if you're carrying around pain or fear, it's surely getting in the way of him seeing the beautiful and real you underneath that he would want to know and love.

Don't keep a man from seeing the best of the real you that's inside. Make it easy for him – and for you.The best place to get in touch with this for yourself as a woman, and help a man recognize the beauty inside you is right here.



Now, back to working with your own expectations, and being with a man and discovering how he is feeling.Here's a question that's probably already on your mind...

How can you be sure you're involved with the right guy, and know how he's feeling, and if he shares your expectations and desires?The answer is honesty. honesty is one of the most liberating and valuable traits to develop - and it's even more valuable when you're dating.

And guess what else?It feels really good to be completely open and honest.Plus, even when it seems like it would push you and a man apart, it has an amazing way of bringing you closer together and building more love and admiration.

But only if you know how to share your thoughts and honest feelings in a way that serves you and your relationship.Not all communication is equal.

You can mean something, but depending on how you share it with someone... it can either be received as loving and "good"... or as negative and critical.

How is what you are feeling being received?And how does this relate to the way you choose to communicate what you are feeling?

A WAY TO COMMUNICATE YOUR NEEDS AND DESIRES TO A MAN THAT HE'LL LOVE AND RESPOND TO

Let me tell you something important that you might have gotten mixed up inside your head as a woman in relationships with men who wouldn't listen.It's ok to want what you want and to let a man know it. In fact, it's a must.And it's ok to tell a man that his behavior doesn't match with what you want.

For example...If a woman is honest and up front about what she wants and expects from a man, in a way that says that she's not too attached to the immediate outcome, and she subtly lets him know that he better have his act together or else.

It can turn the usual "teeth pulling" talk into an opportunity for building attraction and a deep source of commitment with a man. But remember...you can't fake it.

You have to be in a place where you truly believe that you'll find and meet your expectations for love and relationships, with or without the man who's there in front of you right then.

No matter how much you love him.That means you have to be in the right frame of mind, and state in your heart, before you start the conversation with him...

But most women aren't in the right frame of mind because they're afraid, and they've "tricked" themselves into thinking that their intimate feelings for a man will scare him off.

WRONG.

It's not honesty that will scare him off, it's the negative, fearful and anxious "vibe" that you unknowingly give off before you finally explode because you can no longer hide how you feel from the man you're with. That's what scares some men off or makes them clam up.

The amazing thing is that men crave honest women who are up front about who they are and what they want in relationships.The key is to know the right way to communicate these things without going over the top.

Remember, if you communicate with a man in a way that assumes, begs, convinces, or makes him think that you're "entitled" to a relationship and a commitment with him, he will never, ever respect you and want to stay for the long-term.

You might get what you want in the short- term if he gives in to your wishes just to avoid a conflict, but trust me, you are headed for much bigger problems in the future.

Or worse, you'll get what you want now, but he's spent the past months - or even worse, years - secretly seething with resentment towards you. Not good.

GIVE HIM A GOOD REASON TO WANT TO COMMIT TO YOU

You just can't "talk" a man into wanting to commit to you by listing all the ways your relationship is special.This is something very important to remember when it comes to men and relationships.You have to give a man the right "reasons" for him to want to and make himself commit.

Becoming deeply committed doesn't often just happen with the passing of time for a man. He won't want to commit "just because" it's been six months or a year (or longer).

He won't commit to you because you explain how you think you're better than all the women he's dated or because you have such a great "connection."

Nope, he's going to commit for his own reasons. So what are these "reasons"?
They're very complex if you don't understand them... but simple at the same time.
A man's reasons for committing, or not committing, are his feelings and emotions. Sounds simple, but it's profound and true.

The "masculine" part of a man has to feel like he is naturally and of his own free will choosing to be with a woman.If this happens, his commitment will usually be strong and lasting.

But if he commits because a woman has been talking to him and analyzing things to show him how a relationship really makes "sense", then his commitment won't be strong... and it probably won't last. See the difference?

A man's motivations for commitment are how a woman makes him feel when he's with her.

If you want him to respond and have committed feelings for you, then you need to do more of the things that will make him feel those feelings of desire, interest and attraction that lead him to want to commit. Still with me here? Good.

In other words, words and conversations are the least powerful and effective tools that a woman has when it comes to love and relationships.

The feelings of attraction that she can create, sometimes without even speaking, are the most powerful.

Now, I was only able to give a few simple tips and insights on how to better connect with a man in a way that will lead you both closer together and help him not only talk, but feel committed.


I will talk to you again soon. Keep on Dating There is someone out there for everyone. Best of luck in life and love!

Did You Know Why Politicians Cheat On Their Wives

When a cheating politician like “X” makes the headlines, everyone asks: Why would a successful politician like “X” jeopardize his marriage and his career by cheating on his wife?
Politicians cheat on their wives or have extramarital affairs for a variety of reasons. The reasons are almost as varied as the cheating politicians themselves. The following are the most common reasons why politicians, public figures, and other prominent, or rich and powerful men cheat on their wives.

1#. A Sense of Entitlement

Politicians and public figures feel a certain sense of entitlement. They often feel that they can do whatever they want with impunity, and that includes having extramarital affairs. Since they consider themselves to be above the law, they feel they are exempt from the rules that apply to the rest of society.

2#. The Thrill of the Chase

Many cheaters actually thrive on all the excitement associated with having an affair. They get the kind of adrenaline rush from cheating on their mates that they’d get from participating in skydiving or other high risk sports. Cheating politicians are no different. They get a charge from the subterfuge – all the sneaking, lying scheming and other covert activities involved in keeping an extramarital affair hidden from public view.

3#. Ego-Embellishment

Politicians and public figures also cheat for a variety of ego-embellishment reasons. Having an extramarital affair can bolster a cheating politician’s ego in two ways. It can boost a flagging ego, or it can feed the already inflated ego that many politicians have. They mentally congratulate themselves for being so clever, so cunning, so intellectually superior that they’ve outwitted everyone around them by hiding what they’re doing behind closed doors.

4#. Infidelity as a Status Symbol

Many politicians and public figures view having a mistress or patronizing a high-priced call girl or prostitute as a status symbol of some kind. To many rich and powerful men, or other men in high places, the ability to afford a call girl of a certain caliber is the ultimate mark of success.

5#. The Excitement of Engaging in the Forbidden

Just like ordinary men, sometimes cheating politicians engage in infidelity or extramarital affairs solely for the excitement of getting away with doing something that’s forbidden. They revel in the thought that they’re smart enough to elude detection by pulling the wool over everyone’s eyes.

6#. The Knowledge that They Can Get Away With It

The main reason many politicians cheat on their wives and have extramarital affairs is because they are confident that they can get away with it. And countless numbers of them do. If they thought for one minute that they might get caught, most of them would never even take such a chance.


What Can the Wife of a Cheating Politician Do?

Every politician’s wife should familiarize herself with the subtle signs of infidelity, because no matter how carefully a cheating politician tries to cover his tracks, there will always be telltale signs. Since most of the signs of infidelity are subtle, knowing what to look for is the key.


I will talk to you again soon.
Keep on Dating There is someone out there for everyone.
Best of luck in life and love!

How To Choose “me” Before “we”

How putting your most important partnership first, the one with yourself, can create the relationship of your dreams

If you’re like most people on this planet, whether you’re single, married, or partnered, there’s a good chance that there is something about your relationship that isn’t giving you what you want. There is something more that you think you should be getting from your guy or gal, but no matter how much you talk, fight, complain, cry, wish or bargain, nothing really ever changes.

Maybe it’s the lack of attention from your honey, or perhaps you're the one accused of being “emotionally unavailable.” Maybe it’s the fighting or the feeling of loneliness that’s got you wondering if this is just how relationships are. Or if you’re single, maybe you keep finding yourself longing for that special person to show up and change your life, but you always seem to be “still waiting.”

Whatever the case may be, and there sure are many when it comes to relationships, here’s some good news that has the potential to change everything – and for the better.

Good news #1: You have the power to create the relationship you want, always, anytime, forever.
Good news #2: Your power comes by taking 100% responsibility for yourself and what you’ve created.

Okay, maybe the second part doesn’t seem like such great news, but it is. Most people go through their entire life focused on the wrong pronouns when it comes to their romantic relationships: “If he would just…, she is always…, I wish that we could be more….” How many times have these phrases uttered from your voicebox? So much attention, complaining, and obsessing over what you have no control over, and in turn, a lot of wasted energy directed at changing things that quite frankly you can’t.

Unless want to become a professional “Fixer of Others” or you’re into sacrificing your life’s dreams just to keep your lover around (which by the way is so not recommended,) then you’ve got to get your pronouns straightened out! When it comes to your relationship, the first and foremost pronoun on your mind should always be M-E, because that is where every relationship starts.

The best lives are lived and created from the inside out. If it’s a dynamic, fulfilling, intimate and authentic partnership you seek, you first must create that kind of relationship with yourself.

"Me" Before "we", What It Takes

While there are no cliff notes, pills or five easy steps, the following five must-have promises to yourself will give you the fortitude and commitment needed to choose ME before we:

Know me. Know who you are at your core. Know your dreams, values, gifts and more. Know the life you want to live, regardless of any relationship, societal pressures or family expectations. Know your own emotional holes and heal them. It’s called self-awareness. Build it.

Truthfully me. Get downright real about how honest you are with yourself. Whether it’s avoidance, denial or just flat out delusion, both men and women lie to themselves all the time to keep away the truths that feel too scary. What lies have you told yourself about we, we or we just to keep a relationship alive? Make a vow to always be honest with ME, to never hide from the truth, no matter what. Commit to unwavering, uncompromising truth with yourself.

Love me. Love yourself first and make your happiness a priority. Contrary to popular belief, loving yourself is not selfish. The more you love me the more you can and will love others. Ask yourself often, “Am I happy?” and give an honest reply. If the answer is no more often than not, take responsibility and change your situation. Take a vow to make your happiness a priority and to make decisions that reflect the love you have for you.

Trust me. When that inner voice of intuition talks to you, listen! Stop taking the advice of your voices of fear, the “shoulds,” and the over-rationalized “musts.” They never have your best interests at heart. Your intuition is always on your side. Make a promise to trust it and act on it.

Honor me. Make the choice to no longer settle for less than you truly want in your relationships. Choose to believe that what you want is possible, and do what it takes to create it.

The truth is, we all have the relationship that we choose. It may not be the one we want, but whether we like it or not, we’ve created it. If you want something different, the only place to start is with ME. It might not be the easiest path, but it will always be the most fulfilling.



I will talk to you again soon.
Keep on Dating There is someone out there for everyone.
Best of luck in life and love!

Thanks!

Powerful Secrets of Sexual Pleasure

Does your partner complain that you are not a good lover? Do you want to improve your lovemaking technique? If you want to make your partner purr with pleasure, you must:

1#. Learn what your partner enjoys. Just because you read about a great technique in an article or book doesn’t mean that it’s something your partner is going to like. You can ask your partner for feedback during or after lovemaking to see what they liked best about your approach.

2#. Remember what pleases your partner. Once you have feedback, stick it into your “sexual Rolodex” (or your favorite mental memory device) and use it again in the future. For example, if your partner goes crazy when you use your nails lightly on their inner thighs, definitely try that again when you’re in bed next time.

3#. Drop your inhibitions. When you hold back because you’re afraid of making a mistake or trying something new, you make your partner nervous, too. Then you feel their nervousness, and it just adds to your inhibitions. Stop the cycle. Whatever you want to do, try it! If it doesn’t please your partner, don’t get defensive, just listen and remember (see #2, above).

4#. Try different types of touch. Has your partner ever complained that your touch is too heavy or too light? Or boring and repetitive? Try using one finger, your thumb, the back of your hand, your nails. Bring in some soft fabric, fur, or a feather to try, too.

5#. Watch your partner’s responses. If you’re doing something your partner likes, your partner’s facial expression should change to one of interest, excitement, pleasure, or even bliss. Your partner may moan, groan, or sigh. If your partner’s facial expression is flat or they are silent, change it up. And if your partner doesn’t give you this kind of feedback, encourage them to do so.

6#. Engage all your senses during lovemaking. Your partner’s body is a marvelous feast spread before you. Let your partner know how good they look, smell, feel, and taste. When you approach your partner on all these levels, it’s simply irresistible.

It isn’t difficult to be a great lover. You just need to be willing to try things, keeping the techniques that turn your lover on and discarding the ones that turn them off. As always, that means good verbal—and nonverbal—communication. Repeat as needed (or wanted).


I will talk to you again soon.
Keep on Dating There is someone out there for everyone.
Best of luck in life and love!

Thanks!